Nothing's changed

I really shouldn't complain, but being pregnant it makes me feel even worse than before. Most of you may know, my husband has a TERRIBLE sex drive. Before we were trying to get pregnant, I practically had to beg for it. I was incredibly proud of him while we were trying to get pregnant though, he really put forth an effort to do what we were supposed to do. Now that we're pregnant, I'm back to having to beg for it. If it were up to Troy, we'd have sex once a month...if that! Being pregnant now, it makes me feel even uglier than before...feeling like my husband doesn't want me. I don't even want to think about how terrible I'll start feeling once I'm 700 pounds and feel like my husband doesn't find me sexy.

Less than a week until our ultrasound. Yesterday I kind of felt like I wasn't even pregnant anymore. And of course the night before I had a VERY real dream that we had lost the baby...so real that I woke up crying and checking my phone to make sure I hadn't actually text someone the bad news. I think the baby knew I was upset, I started cramping last night. Not a lot...just enough to remind me there is still something hanging out in my uterus.